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According to scientists, your meanest friend is the one who cares about you the most.
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Dear Monday, Nobody likes you. Sincerely, everybody
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When someone explains something to you three times and you still have no idea what's going on
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Waiting for wife in fabric shop
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Due to the confidentiality of my job i don't know what i'm doing.
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When giraffes go to work do you think they put the tie at the top or bottom of their necks?  Asking for a friend.
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When you don't have insurance, but you have a Lowes card!
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Have you ever seen one of these sinks
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When the techno party finally ends and you have to exit the warehouse...
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When the government won't do anything to combat global warming... Be a lot cooler if you did
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When you don't get paid for another week and you're forced to use a toothpick to keep your gas gauge from falling to empty.
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My husband when ever he gives the kids a lot of sugar right before bed time.
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2018 is like... Please note: The post-apocalyptical fiction section has been moved to Current Affairs
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This is what happens when you agree to let your kid make dinner.
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EVERYBODY POSTING SUMMER VACATION PICS AND I'M LIKE I WENT TO WORK
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Princess Diana wearing sunglasses... WOW
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When you ask your teenager how their day was and they yell at you for always trying to get in their business...
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My girl's parents are italian and they're coming over for dinner tonight. I have a feeling they'll be impressed
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When a coworker asks me if I want to cover their shift, I'm like... I don't even cover my own shifts.
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I'm the kind of mom who burns one side of the grilled cheese, serves it to her kid with the non-burned side up, and crosses her fingers.
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When you wake up by yourself vs you waking up by an alarm clock
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We weren't put on this earth to just pay bills and die. We also have to suffer a lot in between.
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Almost got lost on my way to work this morning. I hopped on the freeway and was halfway to a new life before I realized I missed my exit.
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Hurry Up Ruffles Eat DE Bad Stuff... DEN Maybe Ma Buy Us Our Old Food Again
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Just Found Out My Girlfriends A Man.... What Does That Make Me?!!?
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I Hear Derz A Party Going On Roundz Here
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SHA-ZAM You Are Now ReadyFor YUR Work Day
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Oh no they caught me run my friend
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