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When you compare the size of a gummy worm versus a gummy bear, it starts to paint a horrific picture of the gummy universe.
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When you gotta work on your triceps at 5 a.m. and then go to Starbucks at 6 a.m.
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When the Taco Bell food you ate kicks in...
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The first person to cook rice probably cooked way more rice than they expected.
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I'm stuck in south Korea's airport because of my son...
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Everyday I understand the phrase " I'm getting too old for this sh*t " on an even deeper level
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It started out with a kiss how did it end up like this
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When a coworker asks if I want to hang out with them after work, I'm like...
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Me when someone asks me how drunk I am...
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Me trying to do more than one thing at a time...
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When you and your girlfriend only have one pair of jeans
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I was opening a bag of chips on the plane and the little guy in front of me did this...
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I dropped my phone and when I picked it up, it was barely holding itself together and my girlfriend straight up told me to pit it in rice.
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My therapist: You need to stop fixating on " Skull Cow". It's not real and it can't hurt you. Skull Cow:
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Winter is officially over and mosquitoes are like...
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To catch the squirrel. one must become the squirrel.
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he tried to catch the ball but it hit his face
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When your owner comes home with another cat's hair on them...
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Whenever I go to my mom's house, Orion is always sitting on the couch like this...
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When you get older and you start thinking about how many lives you have left on this earth.
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My dog brought me some dirt today
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What? It's Saint Patrick's day, right?
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Oh no, this part is so scary!
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Ninja level 99. Came home in the rain. Found this guy in our kitchen... we don't have a cat.
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And here we have some furry statues.
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Pretty sure this is his brother from another mother
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Floof and mini-floof
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My dog when he sniffs my leg and smells my neighbor's dog.
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